Suffer Well
Pain hits us all, some more than others. Nobody comes through this fallen world completely unscathed. Human reaction to pain is often to cry out “why me?” Until recently I had never asked that question. I just figured, “Why not me?”
Famine and war, pestilence and disease, loneliness and hate all persist. So we have to ask ourselves that question when life goes wrong, "Why not me? What makes me so special that turbulence must never hit me?”
We want un-calloused hands and untroubled minds. However, those of us with seemingly perfect lives still can find something to complain about. The human state is one of discontent. Without pain, we can't appreciate pleasure because of the normalcy of our pleasant existence. You don’t know about the sweetness of deliverance unless you have tasted the bitterness of bondage.
Some may think that suffering is not for the weak. I beg to differ because without suffering we all would be weak. So suffering is, indeed, meant for us.
I truly wish to suffer well. I wish to live a life so at peace, that even if I suffer, I know that there is something good to be attained in the end. Life is not perfect, and we don’t always get what we think we want out of it. We are not in control and much to our chagrin, the Almighty doesn’t always answer in the ways we think He should. Sometimes, He allows us to suffer. (This philosophy, however, doesn't sell a lot of books.)
My life has not been one of ease or comfort. In fact, by all accounts, I should be completely fragmented and mentally ill. I don't know why I'm not crazy at this point. Most people when they get to know me would have never known the tragedy my life has been. They remark, “Wow, you seem so normal!”
What is normal anyway? We live in a selfish, greedy, screwed-up society that in my mind is anything but normal. Sometimes I get frustrated and feel like I really don’t belong here, othertimes I get smacked in the face with my own fallability. I am a sinner and I can be very good at that vocation. I can be selfish. But I long for a life beyond this.
Even when times are good, more times of suffering await. Death denial keeps us moving forward despite having an assurance of our demise. Meaning must somehow emerge from the depths of the darkness of our suffering.
So if I suffer, may it not be wasted. If I suffer, may it be used as a means to walk alongside others who also suffer. May I be a vessel of mercy, compassion, and understanding as I share with my fellow sojourner the lessons I have learned, as we dig out of the nightmare together.
